Slices of "almost" Autumn

 

I anticipate the coming of Autumn like the buds of flowers anticipate their time to open into bloom. We are still in the waiting period before we see any sense of "sweater weather", however after around six months of summer heat I am so eager to enter into the gradual change of season. These are some favourite snippets of a proto-Autumn as I hold onto the hope that some cooler air will venture this way soon.

Tea, of course, is a staple every day, but when the evening temperature is a few degrees cooler it feel all that more comforting to make a tiny pot of loose leaf tea to enjoy with a book. My book (I just finished it) is A Little Learning by Evelyn Waugh.

I built out my own personal curriculum. I plan out for each week of the month different topics and/or authors I want to research and read more about. I select articles and books to read, and I take notes in this pretty notebook I picked up in Oxford earlier this year. Then I write an essay about what I've been learning so I can comprehend and retain it better. I am loving this habit; it's something I've wanted to implement for years, and never have. It just takes some time for planning the month ahead and using some way to track your progress (as accountability).

Autumn gives me the inspiration to write a lot more. Maybe it's the start of a new school year that I still love coupled with the cosier vibes of the season when cooler air comes sweaters are needed along with hot drinks, and books go along with that to me. You need a stack of books to read when Autumn comes around, right? I just picked up this book about C.S. Lewis and his writing life. 

I liked this note from the author:

"The classic works, reading, the life of escaping into great fictive worlds defined Lewis's most formative years. But Lewis didn't merely long to read great literature, as his many letters to his father show; he wanted people to talk to about them."

A I mentioned, tea is essential. I drink it each morning with some breakfast, and herbal tea each evening after dinner at a minimum. Sometimes I will drink tea other times of day if I have time to enjoy it. My hands-down choice for breakfast is the Bird & Blend Chocolate Digestives tea (from the UK). It's black tea that perfectly pairs with breakfast, or anytime later. It's cosy, warm, and perfectly flavored. I'm totally obsessed.

In quiet anticipation of the coming cooler air, I found this fair isle cardigan that I can't wait to wear. I've been looking for a fair isle sweater for years and never found one that I liked, until now. It's invoking all the Autumn colours and darker tones that will go into the winter season, plus it gives off a little sense of the bookish nature, to be worn with jeans or skirts. Now I am really eager for that cooler weather to come!

I have lots of different notebooks for all kinds of different ways I write. The softcover Moleskine pocket notebooks are perfect for taking with me everywhere I go, for jotting poems, thoughts, notes, ideas. This is my new one to replace my now full little spiral pocket notebook that I got in Oxford. I usually lean toward lined pages, but I went with dotted pages for this time to see how I like it. I think I will enjoy it, and I am not super particular about the pages (blank, lined, dotted), though maybe I will be a dotted fan now, other than I never want a wide ruled notebook (no wide ruled!). 

Exploring The City of God

 

For in the ruin of the city it was stone and timber which fell to the ground; but in the lives of those Romans we saw the collapse not of material but of moral defences, not of material but of spiritual grandeur. The lust that burned in their hearts was more deadly than the flame which consumed their dwellings.

-City of God, Saint Augustine

Augustine started writing a mammoth work - City of God, in 413 AD, as the world was in a tumultuous time. Rome had fallen at the hands of the barbaric Goths (from the German north) and someone was to be blamed, the Christians. Christianity had been growing as the fall of Rome was unfolding. Augustine was a Bishop by that time in Northern Africa. He started writing this book as a response to the blame Christianity was receiving due to the reasoning that because they didn't worship the gods of Rome, it angered them.

Through a series of organized thoughts in books and chapters, Augustine places his argument and reasons using historical, theological, and philosophical means to build his case. In it, he contrasts the city of God with the city of man, starting with Adam who occupied the city of God. When sin entered the world, it thus began the city of man, leaving the rest of history to the present day intermingling the two cities.

The city of man represents the love of self (inward seeking only ones own selfish desires). And he explains with historical details how the fall of Rome was on a path long before the birth of Christ. The moral degeneration of the empire caused the collapse of the empire, not Christianity. The Roman world had once held high standards, but their demise was in the fact that they lost all that objective sense of morality. It came upon them not as any loss of a material deficit, but in a spiritual and moral collapse across the society. It became the norm to murder politicians and anyone you didn't agree with to gain power. The loss of respect of leadership and the human person degraded the values once held. Yet even as evil is done, human nature still has its own worth and the evil is evidence of God's existence, for evil presupposes good. But good doesn't presuppose evil.

In contrast, the city of God is founded on the love of God, dwelling in the virtues of love, humility, and charity. Augustine recognizes the importance of separation of church and state, noting that the church has a higher calling, that is, the salvation of souls. Further, the church should not seek power of the state to push its doctrine. 

Both of the cities pass along into our present time, intermingled, interwoven. But eventually the city of man will be judged and destroyed in final judgment, while the city of God will bloom fully being in the forever presence of God. Augustine covers topics such as creation, time, human freedom, forgiveness, sin, grace, happiness, and divine knowledge of the future. He brings 400,000 words into a developed argument that emphasize how the love of God is what is worth living for, and the earthly life is a small portion of our overall existence. Our purpose is fulfilled when we love God with all our hearth, soul, mind, and strength. But when we live through love of self, we lead lives that head to destruction due to glorifying earthly love and materials things. The lasting community which is rooted in faith and outward looking love is that which encourages spiritual growth and true understand of human connection and purpose.

New Book Coming Soon - Title Reveal!

 

I am thrilled to announce the title of my forthcoming book - Oxford Literarium - Oxford Writers in Time and Place.

Stay tuned for an October/November 2025 release for purchase (on Amazon)! 

Here is another little snippet from the introduction:

How does place impact writers and thinkers? As research took me deeper into the daily lives of these authors and their thoughts about Oxford, I encountered more than library visits for research reading, I also trotted across the city and into the countryside with these writers imagining it in their time, seeing what they saw in the colleges and on their walks and I would follow along in my modern time. Some things really are still the same. 

I read their journals and notes that describe Oxford and their experience as an undergraduate or a fellow. From sparkling moments to frustrations and everything in between. These places not only provided beauty (whether architectural or natural) which gave space to their thoughts, ideas, or ponderings, but also when a companion was with them a good discussion would ensue. Oxford is centered around discussion, whether in a tutorial or in a café. Meaningful conversations ensued and helped our authors develop their ideas, as it still does today.

Many of these sorts of discussions are recorded in letters and diaries that we can now imagine ourselves as we view them in these beautiful spaces, placing ourselves into their world for a time as our eyes cascade down the pages of records. C.S. Lewis, for example, had that now-famous late-night walk along Addison’s Walk with J.R.R. Tolkien and Hugo Dyson that changed the way he thought about myths that he loved, as he thought they were all false and Christianity was just a myth. In that conversation, Tolkien helped him realize that Christianity was the true myth, the myth became fact through the incarnation, death, and resurrection of Christ.  

Without that late night walk and conversation, highlighted with a sudden gust of wind that showered them with leaves causing them all to stand in awe, we might not have the C.S. Lewis we know today and the books he wrote in the years following that experience. 

Lewis also took long walks from town to town (walking tours) with many friends like J.R.R. Tolkien, Owen Barfield, and his brother Warnie, stopping at country pubs along the journey, reading and reciting poetry while they traverse the hilly, grassy countryside. 

C.S. Lewis’s house, The Kilns, is on a property with a natural reserve and a pond he would visit often, a very short walk from his front door, an area where it is said poet Percy Bysshe Shelley as young boy played around and sailed paper boats on more than 100 years earlier.  

What we see, what we read, what we think about, who we listen to, and what we take to heart. These things shape us. Late night discussions that challenge our thinking and reading good books that present us with ideas we had not considered.  Such ideas may augment what we already built in our understanding, but are we ever a closed book fully perfected in everything? Never. We have more to learn and discuss. 

The book is open, and many pages wait beyond this current page where we are now. Do we dare go further to discover? 

Wit and Wisdom - Pride and Prejudice

 

Why do we still read Jane Austen today, and why do we consider Pride and Prejudice to be one of the greatest English novels? 

Countless movies are made adapting the book. So many re-tellings are written. And even imaginings of the story expanding the book itself or exploring the other characters are written. For modern readers, the language may seem outdated, being written during 1796-1797, but published after revisions in 1813. Yet even though words and structure are not modern, we embrace it today with delight. Some of us dream about people talking today with such elegance.

Austen herself has an elegant way of writing subtlety in her stories which leaves the reader with the ability to imagine and fill in the blanks. It's not that the story is missing anything, it's that she exhibits restraint, letting the reader read between the lines. The result is that every reader can imagine themselves into the story (as a sort of mirror to view themselves) - this contributes to why it's still so good today.

If every single detail was locked tight, the reader would have fewer opportunities for using their own imagination, and would feel much less empathy and connection toward the characters.

Instead, we become attached quickly to Elizabeth, noticing how her wit and intelligence separate her out as one of the only truly sensible members of her family. And we cheer for her in her bright comments. We wait to read what she'll say because she shows how wise she is. And even so, she is still caught in a misjudgment of Wickham and Darcy, setting her up for humble moments of realization, thanks to Darcy's long letter of elegant explanation to clarify. This encourages the growth of her character as she reflects on how she was wrong.

Speaking of Darcy, we view him from the start as prideful and rude, with no regard for the feelings of others, yet something happens as Elizabeth softens him by his interest in her. Through her sharp, honest refusal of him he awakens to a humility he probably never saw coming, but essential to his growth as a character, as he takes to heart the errors Elizabeth presented, needing his correction.

Is this not the re-alignment of the Christian virtues? When we get out of alignment, we need to be rebalanced. Sometimes that comes with the difficult task of examining how you need to change, and recognizing humbly that you may have been wrong.

Austen did not write romance. It leaves all of that for between the lines. Most men out there probably never attempted to read this book assuming it was sappy and romantic. It's actually the opposite - ironic, sharp, witty, and filled with sparkling dialogue and difficult situations with people. This is timeless material. We can fit it into our day today. It's a huge part of why we love it so much and why I am re-reading it again (for the 5-6 time? I've lost track). I also love that C.S. Lewis read all of Austen's novels and he wrote an essay ("A Note on Jane Austen") that ends with a brief description of the cheerful moderation of the favorite characters:

She has, or at least all her favourite characters have, a hearty relish for what would now be regarded as very modest pleasures. A ball, a dinner party, books, conversation, a drive to see a great house ten miles away, a holiday as far as Derbyshire - these, with affection (that is the essential) and good manners, are happiness. She is no utopian.

Literary Tales - Poe and Longfellow

 

As we enter September we start to think about the changing of seasons, into Autumn, which evokes the natural changes of atmosphere and weather. We start to ponder those spooky tales and days when tricks and treats could be filled with a sense of terror. When we think of stories riddled with intrigue and murder, you likely think of Edgar Allan Poe. He is perhaps more popular today than he was in his own time (1809-1849), but why is it that he is popular amidst his tales of terror? He has a truly imaginative stance in his style and story-telling. Poe felt that reading should be delightful (and perhaps unexpected as some of his tales become), not instructional. This alone is a main reason he disliked and opposed Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, another writer in his time, and very well-loved. Poe harshly criticized Longfellow's writings as full of instruction, lacking anything unique, and possibly plagiarized (per Poe). 

Poe and Longfellow were both Boston connected. Poe was born there, but had a tumultuous history with the city, mostly because it was full of the elite writers of the day (Longfellow, Emerson, Thoreau, Hawthorne) whom he opposed in their methods and beliefs. He explored his own way of writing, so he wasn't very fond of Boston or its writers. Though he and Longfellow did agree that Nathaniel Hawthorne's "Twice Told Tales" was worth praising. However, Poe continued to be critical of the literature being written, especially transcendentalist literature. He didn't believe there was a big problem with slavery so he was opposed to the abolitionists, too. When asked to speak publicly, or read a poem, he often did not present himself well, lacking a public presence that would have encouraged support. Poe seemed like he was on the edge of conflict whenever he spoke or wrote a critique. 

Poe disliked Longfellow because of his instruction-moral-type writing which may have seemed to him formulaic and lacking in imagination, and he predicted that Longfellow (who was very often-read and popular in their time) would fade in the future. In a sense, he was right. Longfellow is not nearly as popular or read today, whereas Poe is. I wonder if Poe is more popular today then Longfellow was in their day. I reflect that I was assigned readings of Poe in middle-school, but not Longfellow. Though society in their time likely thought Poe was a wild, drunken, immoral poet focusing too much on macabre themes. Today, he's deemed as a poetic and storytelling great, and I don't disagree with that. He is worth reading and is a master in his genre. He writes vividly, imaginatively, and he creates a wonderfully spooky tale of the actions of humans caught in their murderous plights, perfect for those blustery Autumn nights lit by candles and a fireplace. But likewise, Longfellow is worth reading. He worked on a translation of Dante's Divine Comedy with his colleagues at Harvard and his poems are pieces of American history. It is so fun to connect these very different authors to the same time and place (19th century Boston), and learn more about their reactions, critiques, and writings based on how they were experiencing life in history. I love to make literary connections, if you couldn't tell, which always offers more to explore and learn about. It's the joy of reading.

New Book - Sneak Peak!

 

I have exciting news! I've been diligently working on my next book!

Back when I was in Oxford earlier this year, I had the great privilege of spending several weeks there, acquiring a Bodleian Reader card to work in the libraries every day. It was a dream come true, to put it mildly. I was overjoyed every day to get to swipe myself into one of the magnificent, ancient libraries of Oxford University, searching for books on the shelves, requesting books from the offsite storage, and viewing precious archive materials like manuscripts and letters from some of my all time favourite authors.

The reason? I wanted to write a book, a kind of group biography, of some of the Oxford authors - those authors from centuries past who have greatly influenced and inspired me. I wanted to explore what inspired them across space and time and how they might have influenced each other. Oxford the place plays a huge role in that. What did they read and study at Oxford? Where did they live and what were they thinking about? Did they know each other?

I spent weeks reading books and compiling research to help me answer these questions. I researched authors like C.S. Lewis, J.R.R. Tolkien, Dorothy L. Sayers, Evelyn Waugh, Lewis Carroll, Gerard Manley Hopkins, Percy Bysshe Shelley and more.

A short section from my introduction:

We have the great benefit from our position in history to have such a backward-looking stance that we can go study the life and writings of someone like Robert Burton in the 1620s and then review those writings of C. S. Lewis in the 1930s and see how they interact and speak across time. Did anything that Lewis read in Burton’s The Anatomy of Melancholy influence his writings? Is it mentioned in his letters, notes, or other works? Does it matter when we engage with the writers and thinkers who have come before us? Is it somehow part of our foundation where we draw ideas from as we move through this journey of life?

This is what I explore in my book. 

I am currently working on the edits and formatting and as I work on these steps, I thought it'd be fun to share a few little bits and pieces here on the blog with you as I get closer and closer to releasing my book out into the world! So, please join along, and I hope you are as excited about this book as I am. Or at least, curious to learn more about these authors and what they were up to in Oxford!

Written on the Heart

 

Jeremiah 31. 31-40

One line from this passage:

I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts.

Our heart. It has a depth that reaches to our true, fullest self. The deepest place of who we truly are and how God sees us in our fullness. We cover up our heart, though, with selfish, inward looking stances that spiral down to self pity, falling farther into ourselves (closing in on ourselves). We diminish ourselves, becoming less and less ourself. The true self, the heart, it is made to expand outward. In the best ways it should thus expand so that others see our true self, as a reflection of God within us. But that is so rare. We are too busy and too caught up from past hurts that stick with us in ways we don't notice. We cover up our heart with worldly things, desires and hidden vices, behaviors, and deeds. We don't get to experience our heart, the hungry heart continues to feel starved and empty. So we show the facade - the world tells us what we need to show. So that layers onto ourselves to make us "happy". And it's not true. But we believe it because we no longer have access to our deepest parts. Everything is shallow, fleeting, and full of selfishness.

I am inspired by Saint Augustine and his writing reflecting on the heart as being the true deep self we so often cover up with selfish desires that spiral inward, specifically as he wrote about his journey in his Confessions, which is his conversion story, so beautifully written. I am exploring this more and more, and it's deeply enriching. 

A few lines from Saint Augustine: 

And you pricked the rawness of its wound, so that abandoning all else it should be converted to you, who are above all, and without whom nothing else would be, yes, converted to you and so find healing.

....

Then, Lord, little by little, with most gentle and merciful hand, you touched and quieted my heart, as I thought of the countless beliefs I held about things I could not see, nor had seen when they occurred.

....

Instantly at the end of the sentence, as if a light of confidence had been poured into my heart, all the darkness of my doubt fled away. 

Fog + Flight

 

Fog + Flight

Early morning fog and flight
Through darkness, in hidden sight
Of landscapes clouded, dewy sky
Envelopes all scenes, they pass by
Shrouded and still, still asleep
Tucked away softly in its keep
But I scatter the clouds from within
As my car zips through, leaving therein
No trace, just the dozy morning fog
Sleeping soundly upon lamp and log.

I recently took an early morning flight for a work trip, waking much earlier than I ever would, drinking a quick cup of coffee, and creeping with my suitcase downstairs to take to the road. Well before dawn was even peaking at the horizon, I was on my way to the airport,  accompanied by other early morning travelers and the surprise fog. The clouds were so low I was driving through them. It felt like another world, I couldn't help but smile at the misty cloud right above my head. Street lamps cast a mystical triangle glow forming shapes that are not usually there, right in the air around me.

Since I am not normally traveling to the airport at 5 am, though it was a very long day, I loved how the different time of day and the weather caused me to look at the world with fresh eyes, with wonder, and appreciation of the mysteriousness. I thought about how most people would never see the fog, it likely burned off as the sun came up. The fleeting nature of nature is something that causes me to pause and enjoy the ever-changing moment. The misty fog was just in that area for a few miles, then I drove out of it, out from under the mysterious canopy of ground cloud.

Hot Reads!

 

It's hot out there! Isn't it the perfect time of year to cosy up inside with a good book? Granted, I will say that about every season, but when the temperature is in the 90s and the feels like (with the humidity) is above 100 degrees, you just don't want to be out there. If you need a few ideas, here are some books I've read recently, which may spark your curiosity.

The Return of the King, J.R.R. Tolkien
A re-read for me. I feel I need to read The Lord of the Rings every couple years. The books speak different things into you each time you read them. This is the third book, the conclusion of the whole story, which really is one book. This is where the battles all come into fruition in the final risky scenario where everything stands on the edge of a knife. One stray move, and it all could crumble with evil reigning over all Middle-earth. Love and friendship is displayed in the deepest ways, humble serving, servant leadership, loyalty, eucatastrophe, and the defeat of evil.

Christian Reunion and Other Essays, C.S. Lewis
This is the only book that holds this essay "Christian Reunion", a rare essay written around 1944, but not published until this volume in 1990. It's a rare taste of Lewis discussing denominations and division in the church. He approaches the conflicts with such a thought provoking stance that doesn't alienate anyone, addressing it in a way that leaves you feeling hope for unity, not any negative feeling toward the other religious view. This is a great example of why Lewis is so cherished, though he tried to stay away from commentaries like this. Having this example is a treasure, and a very useful element of discovery for me in my new book I am working on (stay tuned!).

Lessons in Crime: Academic Mysteries, Martin Edwards (editor)
A collection of short stories, mostly fun with a little bit of gruesome, from the golden age of crime into the modern time, that circles around the world of academia. Loved having a short story by Dorothy L. Sayers and Arthur Conan Doyle included. A lot of murders happen in Oxford academia in the mystery book world. Be careful if you enter academia in a mystery novel, things will be dangerous, and probably a bit fun too.

History of a Six Weeks' Tour, Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley and Percy Bysshe Shelley
The youthful 16-21 year olds Mary and Percy travel with another friend Claire around Europe after it opened up to travel after the Napoleonic Wars. They see the ravage the wars caused but also the beauty of nature around France, Switzerland, Germany, and Holland. Through a shared journal and letters, we see their experiences surrounded by dramatic natural beauty, which influenced their writings. They go deep into mountains, venturing across lakes, and gazing at the waterfalls, gathering up their ideas and descriptions along the way. You can see the spark of what writings are to come from them, with Shelley's poetry, and Mary's Frankenstein. 

Life Time, Russell Foster
The importance of sleep we all know, but it's something too easy to neglect with our busy lives. This book studies how it affects our health and our mind (alertness and ability to focus). Reviewing how it's different across ages from infancy to elderly. It made me more diligent about going to bed earlier (which has been a goal of mine hence why I picked this up to read) and also waking up around the same time, and also not eating late. Simple changes that require a bit of diligence, but well worth it.

Celebrating with Fireworks

 

I don't see fireworks too often, but when they are right outside my window, I pull up a chair and enjoy the show. A fireworks show always draws crowds, even for a short 15 minute show. Why are fireworks used for celebrations? Do you ever wonder? 

John Adams wrote to his wife in July 1776 that “I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated, by succeeding Generations, as the great anniversary Festival…It ought to be solemnized with Pomp and Parade, with Shews, Games, Sports, Guns, Bells, Bonfires and Illuminations from one End of this Continent to the other from this Time forward forever more.”

The first organized celebration of Independence Day was July 4, 1777 in Philadelphia. This is also when the Declaration of Independence was adopted. That evening there was a special dinner held, 13 canons fired (for the 13 colonies), streamers, band performance, and military demonstration. The evening ended with fireworks. Boston was the first city to declare July 4 as a holiday in 1783. Congress made July 4 an official holiday in 1870. Eventually cannons were phased out (a bit dangerous) and fireworks became more readily available and used for the celebrations.

Perhaps the way that fireworks showcase a sense of awe and spectacle among people, usually accompanying some kind of celebration or gathering that we can all partake in together. It promotes a sense of unity when (especially in times of division) we can all enjoy a show of exciting blasts of exploding colors in the velvet sky, appreciating and celebrating the country we are blessed to live in. Whatever the views of each person, a thankfulness should fill each one for the freedoms and liberties that have been fought for (defended) by our own fellow citizens in difficult ways and across time. We would not be enjoying the freedoms we live now if not for many people who have sacrificed their lives for the country, and that's an ongoing thing. We should not take that for granted, but instead pray for the nation we are part of. May it uphold the values upon which it was founded.

Summer Morning

 

Oh that my word were done
As birds that soar
Rejoicing in the sun:
That when my time is run
And daylight too,
I so might rest once more
Cool with refreshing dew.

- Christina Rossetti

You wake up on a summer morning. It is still dark, but the sky is beginning to glow at the horizon. Warmth surrounds you and the humidity holds the air in its embrace, but you had a good, restful sleep.

Stretching out under a thin cover, you listen - - silence of the early morning is only penetrated by a bird across the street, chirping its pre-dawn call. You ponder the silence and let it calm you as your thoughts come out of a dream you now cannot recall. It faded seconds after you opened you eyes, shimmering for a moment as you hovered between the dream world and the waking reality.

Notions and recollections of the previous day might be starting to shift into your mind, but you hush them with a prayer of thanks - -

    Lord, thank you for this day

Recognizing the gift that a new day is, your mind begins to reflect on that. The temporal nature of our everyday warrants a response from you. Do you ignore the significance and keep trudging into the day to day activities without thought, or do you pause to recognize something beautiful or lovely that occurred, and give thanks to God for it. No matter how small. You might simply say - -

    Lord, thank you for the rain shower last night.  It restored the sunburnt soil. The air felt refreshed afterwards.

Nothing is too small (or too big) for God, and to be thankful for. In all honesty, do we reflect with prayers of thanks for the things we so easily do not take notice of? Turning over some thankful thoughts, lifting them in prayer before rising from the soft sheets, your heart is already set to a state of thankfulness - - ready to see and recognize all the reasons the morning is a gift and filled with beauty.

Now you rise and peak out the window - the glow of the dawn deepens and light casts aside the velvet sky. Soon you find yourself making tea or coffee and your mind leans into a little prayer - thankful for the hot drink to wake you and get you started for the day ahead. And you feel the possibilities of the day rise to meet you like the steam off your drink.

You begin to notice that the quiet of the morning stirs you into a deeper reflective state. Something in you wants to address that. Sitting at your desk or table you take a notebook and pen and linger over some pages of reflections sipping the tea or coffee as you go. Filling blank pages with your current words.

Nothing big or dramatic, but you notice how good it feels to let out some thoughts on paper. No matter how jumbled they might seem. Every page becomes a tale of a day, idea, creative notion - captured at a moment that is already gone by the time you finish the sentence. But now it lives on in the notebook. Its temporal nature as a thought becomes something lasting - you can re-visit sometime in the future.

That's the gift of notebooks and writing by hand. A tangible way to see your own handwriting, unique to you, and some ideas you may forget in a day, but could read again and feel inspired by. 

It's a lovely summer morning as you close the notebook. The sun is up and brightly casting the sunshine outside your windows. Until tomorrow...

Research Days, Stormy Nights

 

With summer heat upon us (as we reach the Summer Solstice), we get into the cycle of repeat weather. The nature of bright, sunny, hot mornings and days lead into the afternoons brewing menacing clouds and thunder - it's on constant rotation. A storm was swirl and build together over our heads and we don't even notice it. Sometimes the storm hovers just a few miles away, sitting there like an angry dog guarding something. I can hear it and see it lurking, but it sits just over the road (seemingly). But then it eventually crosses over the road and pours out the built up heat in the form of heavy rain. I take full advantage of the darkened stormy atmosphere by grabbing my current read (The Return of the King) and getting cosy in my armchair to enter the world of Middle-earth. Stormy weather warrants curling up with a book. 

Then, later in the evening as the sky clears a bit and the sun lowers nearer to the horizon, the sky is ablaze with fire from the sun. It's amazing how the dark and light contrast so dramatically in the sky. The dark is darker and the light is radiant. Glory to God for His creation.

I am still working my way through the huge book of Christina Rossetti poems, loving every page of it. This poem I read this week seemed oddly, aptly appropriate, titled "For one Sake":

One passed me like a flash of lightning by
To ring clear bells of heaven beyond the stars:
Then said I: Wars and rumours of your wars
Are dull with din of what and where and why;
My heart is where these troubles draw not nigh:
Let me alone till heaven burst its bars,
Break up its foundations, roll its flashing cars
Earthwards with fire to test and purify.
Let me alone tonight, and one night more
Of which I shall not count the eventide;
Its morrow will not be as days before:
Let me alone to dream, perhaps to weep;
To dream of her the imperishable bride,
Dream while I wake and dream on while I sleep.

While the heat rages endlessly outside, I sit at my desk reading and researching, working on my next book. I make tea or coffee, put on some instrumental music, and get focused and working. This atmosphere is conducive to thinking. I have nowhere I need to be, I will have time later to run an errand, but for now, I can completely focus. I get up and search my bookshelves for reference material. Today, I need to reference some of my Owen Barfield books. I quickly grab four of them, and plop them down on my desk to dig into. It gives me such joy to search my own bookshelves to find books to reference.

So onward I go, back into the books, waiting for the next storm to arrive later on. 

Summer Weather

 

Heat rises steeply, vertically, highly
Accumulating utmost height in the sky,
Swirling and festering clouds form
Not gentle, but heavy with storm
Winds beset, precede the clouds
A call to the indoor, safe haven now
Wild and fierce, relentless, no release
I wait for it to slow; it doesn't cease
Lightning flashed, its power too much
An otherworldly tap, with its milli-touch
And power is gone, overwhelmed by power
All I really wanted was a cooling rain shower
Not today, says the storm, my power is today,
But in a couple hours, the wind swept it away.

The wonder of weather during the summer months. Infused with heat and moisture are all the day. The morning awakens with clear blue hues, sun, and heavy air. As the hours progress the heat rises into the atmosphere and builds up in the formation of clouds. Sometimes a storm will develop and form right overhead, crashing suddenly onto the hot landscape. I peak out the window and see the wind blow and the rain falls in sheets. I watch in wonder and pull out a book to read - isn't that the natural thing to do to enjoy the atmosphere inside? The awe of creation fills me when weather acts like it was created to do. Until the power flickers out....but then it's all swept away and the atmosphere clears.

The heavens were made by the word of the Lord,
and all the stars, by the breath of his mouth.
He gathers the water of the sea into a heap,
he puts the depths into storehouses.
Let the whole earth fear the Lord;
let all the inhabitants of the world
stand in awe of him.
For he spoke, and it came into being;
he commanded, and it came into existence.
Psalm 33.6-9

Stack of Books

 

Current and recent bookstack. Some of the books I've read or currently reading now. It makes me so happy to have a little bookstack of good books. 

Alice's Oxford - People and Places that inspired Wonderland, Peter Hunt

Well this was fun. After coming back from Oxford, I was right back in Oxford, visiting all the places associated with Alice. There was a little bit of history about each place, and how it showed up in the Alice books - many of which I had not seen before. The author also included many of the Tenniel illustrations and insights how Oxford shows up in many of those scenes, such as the Queen of Hearts scene in the garden. In the drawing there appears in the background the Lily House of the Oxford Botanical Garden. The Botanic Garden might be where Alice met some of the flowers in Looking-Glass, who were rather philosophical.  

Loss and Gain, John Henry Newman

The story of Charles Reding, a young undergraduate at Oxford in the 1840s, who journeys through the tumultuous religious times in the Church of England, as liberal enlightenment ideology entered the church, the Oxford Movement rose against it, and Catholicism was deemed as antichristian. Charles navigates the deep discussions with his fellow undergraduates, his family, and elders. Written as a fictional autobiography by Newman, it is the story of his conversion.

At the beginning of the book:

"But how are we to arrive at truth at all", said Reding, "except by reason? It is the appointed method for guidance. Brutes go by instinct, men by reason."  

Sounds a bit like pre-conversion C.S. Lewis, doesn't it?

The Manuscript's Club - The People Behind a Thousand Years of Medieval Manuscripts, Christopher De Hamel

With beautiful color photographs of the manuscripts this is a visit with 12 different collectors or scholars of these manuscripts. Manuscripts have survived for this many centuries because they are valued and preserved. Why were they important and why are they still important? Why were handwritten manuscripts still produced after the printing press was developed? We travel through history to visit each person and their role - from Saint Anselm the Benedictine Monk (1033-1109) to more modern times of Sir Sydney Cockerell (1867-1962) and the space in between. It is an interesting study of the people who had influence on these manuscripts, and their reasons for it. A bit of history and bookish detail along the way. 

1984, George Orwell

I have been wanting to re-read this book. It's the kind of book that warrants a re-read every few years as our world changes, it is that warning reminder of the importance of truth, freedom, words, and meaning. Orwell builds this soon-to-come future of how life could look if we do not continue to fight for freedom, a totalitarian regime would control every single aspect of your life: Big Brother would be watching you from all your screens at home, what you read, where you go, what you write, what you say. Even what you think (the Thought Police will eventually catch you). Once they have your thoughts in their control it's a total loss of humanity.

"The thing that he was about to do was to open a diary. This was not illegal (nothing was illegal, since there were no longer any laws), but if detected it was reasonably certain that it would be punished by death." (pg. 7)

Black Coffee, Agatha Christie

Such a fun read. This is adapted from the play that Agatha wrote. A family mystery in a large estate home. A poisoned coffee leads to death, but who put the poison in the coffee? And why? Poirot is called in to help discover the truth, and as he talks to members of the family, additional motives for murder are revealed. You try to make your own assumptions based on the conversations who did it, but some new tidbit of information makes you question your theory. 

Christina Rossetti, The Complete Poems

I've mentioned how I have been reading through her poems and it is wonderful. Such a mix of topics from family, seasons, nature, religious, dream-like, creative. Some are so beautiful I read them a few times:

Time was I bloomed with blossom and stood leafy
How long before the fruit, if fruit there be:
Lord, if by bearing fruit my heart grows heavy,
Leafless and bloomless yet accept of me
The stripped fruit-bearing heart I offer Thee.

The Bookish May

 

JUNE
Indeed I feel as I came too soon
To round your young May moon
And set the world a-gasping at my noon.
Yet some I must. So here are strawberries
Sun-flushed and sweet, as many as you please;
And here are full-blown roses by the score.
More roses, and yet more.
(May, eating strawberries, withdraws among the flower beds.)
(Christina Rossetti)

I mean, every month is bookish, so let this be the sum of the bookish month of May. It's hard to believe it's already time to wrap up the month of May. May sits in the "in between" space before summer officially kicks in, but it's certainly not spring anymore. The weather seems a bit uncertain, like it can't make up it's mind. Part of the month was lost in a blue sky daze, dry and hot. Then suddenly it took a dramatic turn to the stormy afternoons, whereby now I have to pay attention as I leave work - will I be able to run an errand or will I get caught in a deluge? 

A quick day trip down to the coast, a little visit to my hometown, and then a bit of frolicking in Sarasota, of course my main goal was to visit the bookstore in the Selby Library, a favourite spot of mine since high school. It's always good to get back there. 

I also had the privilege of attending the Chesterton Academy Gala, which was an inspiring evening celebrating the classical academy with discission on virtues missing from schools today. G.K. Chesterton wrote a lot about the Christian virtues, and is a good guide to us all as we think through living and learning (for the next generation, and for ourselves, no matter how old we are!).

And I took my niece book shopping as we had an afternoon hanging out, which was a joy. Then we came home and read. It makes me happy to browse books and see anyone excited to read. I grab those chances whenever I can.

Amongst many other books, I've been reading through this massive collection of the poems of Christina Rossetti. Every morning I read a handful of pages of her poems. I had no idea she had written so many. This book is 880 pages of her poems, and I am loving them. I've always liked Christina Rossetti, but I think now that I am visiting with her more, she's at the top of my poet favourites. She was a faithful Christian and a creative spirit. He writings play with different rhymes and musicality and it's just beautiful. Some poems are lyrical and emotional, some are a response to a reading in Scripture, some are children's poems, some like the extract above play with personifying nature (or the months of the year and it's simply delightful, and some are in praise of nature as God's creation.

Our heaven must be within ourselves,
Our home and heaven the work of faith
All thro' this race of life with shelves
Downward to death.

So faith shall build the boundary wall,
And hope shall plant the secret bower,
That both may show magnifical
With gem and flower.

Needless to say it's been a wonderfully bookish May, and I am very glad about it. June has a lot to live up to.

Embracing the Analog

 

A couple weeks ago I read a book about the masters of art and how to view them through a Christian lens (called Rembrandt is in the Wind by Russ Ramsey). It was such an enjoyable introduction to several of the masters. One of my goals is to learn more about the masters of art from history, who the artist was, why their work is important, and what it can say about truth, beauty, and goodness. So I am on a journey of art discovery. The epilogue of the book was titled "We are short on masters" and it was very compelling to me. The truth of it. We lack true masters of things today which evoke the transcendentals - truth, beauty, and goodness. Today, we are distracted by celebrities and musicians (not really masters) who do not set good examples or evoke the goodness we would want to pass down to the next generation. The culture focuses on hedonistic lifestyles and influencers who lead and show how it can be done (with seemingly no consequences). Their lives are on display, not a creative mastery of something, it's all about them, often standing for the opposite of goodness and truth.

We don't value the things of old and the gifts they give us of learning from them (discovering along the way how amazing they are in true talent and wisdom). As a virtual reality grows more and more, the analog creative skills diminish, even basic things like knowing how to write in cursive or reading an analog clock face. I've heard that these things are no longer taught to children in school, so what else are they not learning? Sure, the new certainly has its place I don't dispute it, but I write from a literary and creative perspective to defend the analog. Books, pens, paper, and time. 

High schoolers getting ready to graduate go through their school years never reading an entire book. They look it up online for summaries and plots. Old books and thinkers are not part of the curriculum. Developing young minds to read and think deeply, learning to think for themselves and defend their ideas is a thing long forgotten in the public world. We will have even fewer masters in the next generation.

My experience researching and reading in Oxford is hopeful. All the analog activities of finding books, reading books, touching original manuscripts, letters, and papers of those past authors of such brilliance. These are all valued at Oxford. These things are not arbitrary, they are in fact the greatest technology invented - books and letters, paper and pens. This is how we have shared ideas and creative avenues for centuries. They involve a writer who takes a tangible object creating something using the ideas in their minds. They propel discovery and deep thinking. These things cannot be lost, yet our culture more and more seeks to reduce and diminish their importance.

It all just gets me thinking and wondering about the simple objects of paper, pens, and books. My younger self was hugely influenced by the act of using these objects to fight boredom, be creative, generate my own ideas and stories, and share words with others. These formative years of my life held a love for these analog ways of thinking and expressing ideas. I know that I am a more thoughtful and deep thinker in my adult years partly because of this.

I was pulling books off the shelves in the Bodleian Library that were from the late 1800s up to a decade ago, finding them in the various locations was part of the tangible enjoyment. I would carry them up to the upper Radcliffe Camera to read. Then, one day I was pulling Lewis Carroll books to read and research which I opened to the front pages, as I usually would, to see the Bodleian stamp of acquisition (which is in every book) as March 20, 1930. I was sitting in the Radcliffe Camera that morning, it was March 20, 2025. Exactly 95 years from when that book was stamped into the Bodleian Library. It was a serendipitous moment that could not have happened except with hard copy books. It made me smile the rest of the day.

I say all this as I type it out on my laptop, and yet I made all these notes in my little jots notebook with a pen as it hit me one day. I always have a little notebook on me or close by me wherever I am. I love thinking on paper. There is something about gripping the pen and the movement across the page that gives you enough time (almost) between words to keep the flow of thought in sync with your pen. I have to eventually type it out, but it's not as satisfying. Do you write with pen and paper anymore? Do you read physical books?

Oxford Has Changed Me

 

How has Oxford changed me?

It's not dramatic as a movie would portray, in fact, I am probably the most boring creature ever with no drama, seeking the quiet lifestyle. Yet sometimes it is the subtle, small bits over many years that grow to become an underlying aspect that you at some point realize affects almost all areas of life. However, on this recent particular stay, I can say there are some bigger impacts that excite me to continue to ponder and study:

- Oxford has helped me navigate independent research and lifestyle. I have never been in the UK for so long at one time before. The experience has helped me enjoy the discovery of how to live in a foreign country, to study and find things in libraries, where to go for lunch, food shopping and cooking, where to spend some exploring time. It has caused me to be more friendly to random people in the daily routine and conversation.

- Oxford has helped me learn to use my time wisely. Being so focused in my research, I had to make sure I dedicated time to that, reading, and writing, whilst I also continued to keep up with my real world work and other daily things that needed to be done. Even with the longer stay, time was limited, so I was very careful with planning out all the books and manuscripts I wanted to spend time with.

- Oxford has propelled me to recognize how content I am with my (seemingly boring) life, how blessed I am. In both places, home and whilst in Oxford. I am happiest when surrounded by books and have a lot to read, study, research, and think about. Add a little bit of good food, coffee and tea, and a few artistic adventures (art museums, history museums, orchestra concerts, lectures) and I am content. It is a quiet, but thoughtful lifestyle. Enjoying the daily routine is key, and setting myself up with the things that bring such enjoyment in the pursuit of creating something good through my writing.

- Oxford helped me appreciate the cosy, familiar home I have full of books and comforts, compared to a more spare stay in Oxford. Living very minimal in the UK came easy for me, but it also made me eager to go home to my little place with my friendly shelves loaded with books. It just made me see how I can live with less. At home, of course, I have a closet full of clothes and shoes, dishes I selected, and shelves of books. I can do both - they each give me a different sense of day-to-day and appreciation, and there are benefits to each.