Snapshots

Ahhh, the weekend. What do you look forward to the most each weekend? Sleeping in? Running errands? Indulging in a cup of tea more often? Relaxing? I say yes to all of the above.

 I received a really cool invitation from my alma mater, Florida Southern College, for a premier of the historic center for Frank Lloyd Wright. I am so bummed that I will not be able to go (I will be out of town), for I love the architecture and the stories of the famous architect and the campus he had many visions and ideas for, all of which did not happen, but are on paper, with dreams of becoming reality. This new center is one of those such dreams from his notebooks.

It's what's for dinner. At last asparagus was a reasonable price, so I indulged. Nothing beats fresh vegetables. I really enjoy the simple things. Fresh. Simple. Tasty. 

Getting to know my 1975 Minolta camera is helping me take better photographs. The manual process of taking a photo forces you to be more thoughtful. It's not just about lining up the shot, but it's about getting the right light and the correct focus, and shutter speed. All the combinations create an array of changes you can make to every scene. I really enjoy things that get my creativity flowing, and this is one of those such things.

I Wish......

I wish....I was standing here at the tea bar at Oxford Exchange in Tampa, waiting for my Lavender Fog (in the photo the far gray cup and the steeping tea next to it) like I was when I took this photo. It is the perfect drink. Earl Grey, Lavender, Soy Milk, and Vanilla. 

I wish....the stairs to my apartment were this cool. This is Emily's stair garden (she lives next door) and I am super jealous of her awesome gathering of potted plants, cacti, and herbs.  She is a gardener and I have much to learn.

I wish....I had an endless supply of travel coffee mugs, because mine always break, or leak, or something. I am down to this old one that my Mom found at the house, which I bought in high school and must not have used very much. But now it is leaking. So, anyone know of a good travel mug?

I wish....Autumn would hurry up and get here! Gosh it's still hot here! And we haven't had that first feel of Autumn yet. We have had some pretty days, but they are still very hot. I'm waiting....

Selfless / Loveless

Wind-swept hike in Edinburgh, Scotland

It starts with a gentle wind
that grows swiftly into a fury,
ripping the heart and soul out
of an exposed refuge.
Still showing love beyond all measure,
for no reason we forsee.

Lacking worthiness yet receiving
all the love we don't deserve.
Through this selfless love
we can only find more
than our heart's desire.

A loveless face in the shadow stews,
angry that his gust did not ensue
in the corruption of the holy,
just, and pure. New attempts
will become another folly,
and truest love will always endure.

I Will See You Again

So also you have sorrow now,
but I will see you again and your hearts will rejoice,
and no one will take your joy from you.
- John 16.22

We are all part of a great story and each piece we are a part of matters deeply. That is why death feels so wrong to us. We feel there are still stories to tell. Death cuts short the story we thought meant to be longer.

In the case of losing my Dad four years ago today, this concept couldn't ring more true. His was a story of the most humble man, proud Dad, and loving person. He would talk with you for hours, telling stories. The fact is, there were so many stories left to tell, so many events to be shared, and it was cut way too short. In my eyes, and in your eyes about anyone dear you have lost, my Dad's story was meant to be longer than it was.

And yet it is.

There is a part of the story that has not happened yet. There was a new beginning that already started when he left us. For what we see here on earth is only a small taste of what is to come. And it is even better than we can imagine. But our stories here matter deeply to us, as they should, which means that in heaven these things will have a part to play in that great story.

Emily Dickinson raises the question and wonderment of what is to come, which we cannot answer. But we can all hope for what we cannot yet see, with the faith in what we know to be true.

I reason, earth is short,
And anguish absolute.
And many hurt;
But what of that?

I reason, we could die:
The best vitality
Cannot excel decay;
But what of that?

I reason that in heaven
Somehow, it will be even,
Some new equation given
But what of that?

-Emily Dickinson

Bright Side

Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.
- Psalm 90.14

Sometimes when it is the hardest to look at the bright side is when I want and need to look at the bright side the most. I almost crave something bright against a dark place. When we face trials of any kind we are to count it as joy, which sounds rather strange, right? But by facing and getting through such trials, our character benefits and our trust grows in God's words that He truly wants what is best for us.

Our willingness to hand it over to God begins the clearing of the fog. It is not by our own strength alone that we make it through a dark time.

God tells us that He will never abandon us. Once I remind myself of this fact, no situation I am in seems that daunting anymore. The stress and worry fizzle out and I open myself to God and His strength and omnipotence. I cannot go wrong if I leave it all up to Him.

And I can relax and enjoy a sunset.
Rest and be here, in His arms.
And wake up refreshed.

We need rest, but God does not. Let Him do what He chooses. Let Him be the potter and you be the clay.

Outdoor Orchestra

It was the perfect evening for an outdoor orchestra concert at Lake Mirror. The Imperial Orchestra gave an all strings performance. As it began at 6 the sun was still high in the sky, but it sank in the next hour, and cooled the air nicely. I am so glad my city held an event like this! This is the kind of thing I crave. Talented musicians, great location, free event, gathering of many people. Not to mention the classical pieces that were played. They played one of my favourites by J.S.Bach - Brandenburg Concerto No. 3.

Emily and I sat on her lovely homemade quilt on the soft grass by Hollis Garden. We got to catch-up as we listened to lovely music. We should have brought some picnic fare, but neither of us thought of gathering food to bring (and I think we both needed to go grocery shopping too). I took photos using my new (circa 1975) camera to test it in a myriad of lighting as the sun dropped in the sky.

This town should have more of these orchestra events! By the second hour of the performance, the lawn was packed with people. I will gladly be in the audience to enjoy such an event.

Things I Love About Autumn....

To be honest, my list of things I love about Autumn could be about a mile long. But I will break it down for the sake of keeping a readable list. Now, I just have to wait for the real Autumn to arrive.
What are your favourite things about Autumn?

I love....

• Mustard Hues
• Pears
• Sweaters
• Stew
• Boots
• Coffee
• Pots of Tea
• Reading/Writing Outside
• Socks
• Pumpkins
• Blankets
• Outdoor Concerts
• Lattes
• Soup
• Root Vegetables
• Candles lit
• Rust Colour
• Tights with Dresses/Skirts
• Long Walks
• Big Leaves
• Windows Open
• Apples
• Suede
• Crisp Air
• Cookies Baking in the Oven
• Cinnamon
• Scarves
• Candy Corn

Full with God's Grace

Rainy London

The Lord is my chosen portion
and my cup,
you hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.

Psalm 16. 5-6

The rain falls steadily this evening and I am at peace. Fresh from a shower with a cup of rose tea steaming in front of me, I am full. Full with God's grace and I sit here just recognizing it. Sometimes I need to simply meditate on all that. I know things could be so different in my life right now. I do have dreams that I pray will happen one day, but I acknowledge now that all I have is truly a gift and it is all meant to be enjoyed, even the thing we call work.

In our everyday, there are so many opportunities to help others, to show kindness and love, and to share many things in fellowship. This can all be done with humble hearts with all successes aimed toward our Father in heaven as receiving all the glory. With that outlook, nothing we do is without value when we acknowledge Him in everything we do. And nothing will dampen our spirits.

Letting Go

Endless.
Trodden hopes.
We stand immersed in doubt
negative words surround us now
casting fear into our hearts,
setting aside all we know.

Fear is the prison
we place ourselves in,
limiting our dreams,
boxing in all the potential.

Letting go breaks the leash
tying us down, and I know freedom
never smelled so sweet
as when the love of God
smiles down on me.

Autumn Dreaming

The morns are meeker than they were,
The nuts are getting brown;
The berry's cheek is plumper,
The rose is out of town.

The maple wears a gayer scarf,
The field a scarlet gown.
Lest I should be old-fashioned,
I'll put a trinket on.

-Autumn, Emily Dickinson

My hair is tucked up at the nape of my neck and my legs are curled up under me. The light is fading, and candles burn now, offering a soft glow. Two skeins of yarn and a bamboo crochet hook rest on my sofa waiting for me to build a new project.

My cup of tea steeps and cools off before I start to drink it. I am dreamily thinking about Autumn, but I know it could be months before I get a true taste of the wonderful season of big maple leaves, hot soups, warm blankets, boots, scarves, pumpkins, and cinnamon scents. I wear shorts and have bare feet because Summer lingers. While others who live northward start picking out pumpkins and shuffle their feet through leaves we endure strong afternoon thunderstorms which offer temporary relief and we fake the Autumn season for awhile.

So, I will dream, and pretend a little by adding Autumn colours to my outfits and decor, by making tea, and lighting candles. And I will wait patiently, for the good things in life are worth waiting for.

Weekend Bits

 I have wanted to read some Dorothy Sayers ever since I heard of her. So when I saw this at the library, I snatched it up. Dorothy was living in Oxford the time when C.S. Lewis was and he admired her and her writings, which is quite a compliment since he mostly associated himself with other men. I enjoyed these essays, and would like to read some more of her writings.

 I bought some tangelo oranges, which are my favourite because they are so juicy. So, it only made sense to make a little fresh-squeezed orange juice. Yum.

I have a new toy! A really nice, vintage camera from 1975. A Minolta SR-T 200. At last, something I have been wanting for many years, is a vintage 35 MM film camera. Now it's my chance to learn how to take good, manual photographs. Thanks to my amazing landlord, who decided to give this to me, plus all the accessories! I cannot wait to get some film and start shooting!

Just driving down my alley on my way to church. It was a hot hot weekend. I heard rumors of cooler weather up north...and I got really jealous. No relief here yet.

Dust Clouds

A dryness sweeps across the land
made for reviving droplets;
the antidote is still a distance away.
Determined to drive on
in the relative desert,
dust clouds rise and hinder viewing
so I halt and let the swirls
of wind weave through my hair
and as I stand there,
I realize the reason
for my unpredictable stop.
As I gaze down to the ground
it is found
I stand on the edge of a cliff.
What would have happened if I
just moved forward, without a thought why.
It would be too late
to turn back around.

Pull Up a Cozy Chair

I have a treat for you today, if you happen to like C.S. Lewis and have an hour to listen in.

I love when I stumble across something on a favourite author. This video was something I found a few nights ago and, as with everything dealing with C.S. Lewis, I enjoyed the talk thoroughly. It is given by the Professor at King's College in London, Alister McGrath, who recently wrote a new biography on C.S. Lewis. I am quite interested in reading it, so I am adding it to my list of books to read.

So, pull up a cozy chair, brew a cup of tea or coffee, and listen in on a talk given at St. Paul's Cathedral.

C.S. Lewis- Reluctant Prophet: Professor Alister McGrath
Click HERE for the video.

Plans

May he grant you your desire and fulfill all your plans! - Psalm 20.4

This is a photo of my landlord's hand-drawn plans to build some pavers and walkways where I park my car next to my home. They are neat, tidy, and detailed. And they show me that he has plans for improving the quality of my living quarters.

You know God has good plans for you, right? Do you really believe that? Or do you think it's all a trick?
The difficulty with being human is that we only deal with other humans, who lie, cheat, fail, falter, and hurt others. We are always coming across people who take advantage and do not tell the truth. To protect ourselves we have had to put up a shield to deflect those kinds of falsities that fly in our direction. Sadly, though, that tends to rub off in the way we view God. We don't easily trust Him completely.

The crucial factor in this is whether the desire we have is something you just want, or if it is a desire that God placed in you. The point is opening yourself up to God, including all your plans and desires, so that God can give you the desires of your heart.

It is amazing how your priorities change when you give God everything. When you realize that everything is His anyway. There was nothing to give Him except your feeling of control. It is only then that you will truly know the desires of your heart. And then there is plenty of room for God's plans to move forward.

The Unknown, Remembered Gate

Through the unknown, remembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was the beginning

-T.S. Eliot

Our future is a great story waiting to be completed and fulfilled.

I am living in poetry. How can a few relatively simple words open up a whole world of imagination and thoughtful musing? I can read T.S. Eliot's Four Quartets time and time again and each time I am mystified in a different way. Sometimes my grasping is elusive and other times his words stick directly to my heart and imagination, to the pieces that need words of wonder.

The words do not exactly answer a question, but they raise questions and then you are left wondering if he meant that when he wrote it.

His words keep floating around in my head. They motivate my creative notions and I ponder the words:

Through the unknown, remembered gate....

The sentence itself is a paradox. How can you remember an unknown gate? How could you recognize something you have never seen? Intriguing.

Is that, perhaps, meaning something deeper? Such as what heaven will be like? Like an unknown, remembered gate? A place so familiar in the closest sense and yet somehow completely new.

I think it is. Like in Narnia, when the children see new creation. The new Narnia. They recognize it, but it is not the same. It is even better.

This incredible notion has had me pondering and musing because it is telling me that all that we create here and do here matters because it is a reflection of the true country we were all made for. The things we hold most dear are a part of what is to come.

And that gives me hope, and joy. To know that what I do here really does matter. It is part of the great story that we are all in.

Merry Moments

Weekends are for coffee, books, flowers, and sunlight. Don't you think?
Hot, sweltering Summer days keep me indoors mostly, and I look for entertainment once I have done the essential chores. Tidying and organizing resulted in a lovely space with yellow daisies that catch my eye and brighten my rooms.

Coffee in a new green mug sits close within reach on my table as I write, or read poetry from my new (old) book of Emily Dickinson poems I found for $.25 at the library.

This is what I needed this weekend. A healthy does of books, coffee, cheerful flowers, and time in my cozy home.
The time for variety and travel will come, but until then, I will enjoy every little merry moment I am given.

Reasons Why

I came not of my own accord, but he sent me. Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot bear to hear my word.
- John 8.42

We can get confused sometimes. Whether it be instructions we are given, books we read, wisdom we are enlightened with, or something we are told, it doesn't always register with us immediately. Oftentimes we shrug it off and let it go, and occasionally at a later date something reminds us of what we heard and the words spoken in advance begin to make sense in the present.

Jesus did this a lot. He spoke words to his disciples and they did not always understand what he was saying. They heard his words when he told them things such as:

I come down from heaven, not to do my own will but the will of him who sent me. (John 6.38)

I am going soon and where I am going you cannot come. (John 8.21)

It is not that we don't understand the words, but at the time they are spoken we do not grasp the meaning.

I think that is a significant thing to ponder. That there is a reason behind why certain things click with us down the road. Perhaps we were not ready to fully comprehend the meaning and therefore able to react appropriately, but now we are.

Jesus knew this about his disciples. He knew they would not understand what he was saying until later. And he knows it about us, too.

Do you ever wonder why something isn't revealed to you right away or that you don't realize something until later? There is probably a reason why, and most likely you will see it down the road.

Take Comfort

Take comfort here, my dear
I will make the pathway clear.
When the gentle Summer rain
turns into a gale,
fear not, for in a manner of things
all shall be well.

Not a single tear falls
that I don't see.
Sometimes it's those tears that open
eyes to eternity;
through sorrow and sadness I am
here, and everywhere.
You can reach me anytime, and I listen
to your prayer.

Good is Coming

There must be a truth involved in it, though we may but in part lay hold of the meaning. Even the memories of past pain are beautiful; and past delights, though beheld only through clefts in the grey clouds of sorrow.

-Phantastes by George MacDonald

This is not the kind of book I would pick up by way of judging by its cover. I generally do not fall for the "fantasy" fiction that looks like this. But George MacDonald is all I needed to know to pick this up. This is the true fantasy book, published in 1858, and not like the rubbish that is in that category today. I just finished reading Phantastes and I was sad to end it. I understand why C.S. Lewis and Madeleine L'Engle loved it so much. I was captivated by the dreaminess and odd situations, kind of like Alice in Wonderland.

The tale follows Anodos, the young man who enters a strange land, fairy land, which is dark and dangerous, with weird creatures and trees who are good and bad. Full of good characters full of wisdom to guide Anodos on his journey.

The atmosphere written by MacDonald seeps into your world of your imagination by way of a flood that comes into Anodos' room, and he wanders into fairy land, walking through dark forests and meeting wise women. He meets knights. He is tricked by evil. He never knows what is ahead but he presses on, spending time in the palace, then wandering again comes to a beach where he climbs into a boat which takes him to an island where a woman lives in a cottage at the center with nothing around it. The cottage has 4 doors, each leading to a different place entirely. Each door represents something, such as despair. Anodos goes through each door.....and I won't say what happens.

Also along the journey, he fights giants with two brothers, and mourns the loss of friends. The reader can feel the effect of his sadness. Through the sorrow, he finds a path that leads to good. At last he befriends a knight and a lady who he greatly admires and they approach a ceremony that Anodos quickly realizes is evil. He senses the bad immediately and cannot sit still to watch, so he takes action. I will not spoil it for anyone who reads it. You just need to read.

But at the end, he is sitting under a beech tree and all the adventures and wisdom mixes in his mind with the whispers of what is to come as he sits there he hears "a great good is coming- is coming- is coming to thee Anodos" and he believes that good is always coming. And it is.

Remind Me What Day It Is

How was your long weekend? Hopefully you had Labor Day off. I will guarantee you that all day today I will be thinking it is Monday. It is what happens after a busy weekend out of town. I come back and my mind becomes a-jumble with the days. I will say something about tomorrow, thinking tomorrow is Tuesday, when today is Tuesday. And I will say "today" like it is Monday, but Monday has already happened and I am referring to a past day in the present. Watch out. If you talk with me today I may just confuse you.

Anyway, being in Venice this weekend presented the perfect excuse to bring baby Ellie to the beach to test the waters. She likes water, and she was enjoying it. My niece is the sweetest, cutest baby and such a joy to watch. This is the time I like to go to the beach. The sun is low (in our case, behind clouds) and the breeze isn't hot. Walking on the sand doesn't burn your feet, but it feels cool to the touch. The crowds are gone. No sunburns. No crowds. Lovely.