Reconsider Inconvenience

Arriving in Reykjavík, Iceland

An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered.
- G.K. Chesterton

When you think about it, travel isn't very convenient. It involves packing up a select number of items into one smallish luggage (which never seems big enough) to take with us somewhere far away from home. We leave behind comforts, conveniences, and familiarity. We trade it for adventure, waiting, traveling, and exhaustion. 

Traveling and going on adventures is an inconvenience. Even for us in the modern day, we have to deal with delays and waiting at the airport, missing a train, going through security, dragging our luggage down (and even worse, up) stairs. 

Some of us love to travel, and are well-equipped with the tendency to overlook the inconveniences because they love the adventure so much.

Others of us dislike travel, and would much rather stay at home. But sometimes travel is necessary for work, or for family matters, or even just to get away and recharge.

What if we thought more like G.K.Chesterton and turned something that could be an aggravation into something filled with possibility? 

Can we turn something negative around on its head? Can we imagine the inconvenience of adventures rightly considered? How should it be considered? I like to think that every trip is open to a whole array of possibilities. 

- Consider how much we can learn in our travels about others.
When I travel, one of my biggest goals is to learn as much as I can about the place I am going, the history, the story, the people, and the culture. I read books, do online research, and I study maps. I want to spend time there experiencing the culture like a local. I don't want to go there expecting to eat all the same foods I am used to, or having all the same conveniences. Often I find that their food is better, and their conveniences more efficient. I love seeing from their perspective the neighborhoods and nature. I always feel privileged to experience just a little bit of that.

- Consider how much we can learn in our travels about ourselves.
By learning more about others, I examine myself and find out more about my own beliefs, attitudes, and perceptions. When I travel, I am taken out of my comfort zone in so many ways. I believe it is good for us to be placed outside our comfort zones, as that is when we learn and grow. 

- Consider how much we can learn in our travels about God.
Through all these things, if we reflect and pay attention to what travelling has taught us, we learn more about God, as His diverse creativity in the creation of this world. Through the perspectives of others, visiting holy sights, meeting people who are very different from ourselves, and appreciating the beauty of the world we live in, we are more aware of God's presence in every place. 

Lessons From Listening

Sometimes I sit at my kitchen table, or in my living room and just listen to the neighborhood. I try to stop reading or doing things and be still. It's not easy to do, as my mind has a list of things I could be doing, but I find that it is important to sometimes let my mind drift as I simply listen with a purposeful attentiveness. It's when I do this that my imagination begins to kick in, and the owl is not some background noise, but instead he is hooting a friendly greeting, as a neighbor who has made his home in a nearby tree.

Today, the wind is constant, and at times very gusty. I can thank the tropical storm for that. But that means my wind chimes are playing a lot of music today, and it's beautiful. This morning, the lawn mower was weaving lines across the yard back and forth. A few hours ago, a heavy rain storm came through, strong and short. Now, the sky is clearing and the sun has emerged. 

When I sit with a friend over tea or a meal, I seek to listen to them. I mean really listen, and not just in the sense that I am thinking the whole time about what I am going to say in response. But letting them talk from the heart and be received by an open ear that is listening to their thoughts. As I have gotten older, I have become very aware when someone is not listening to me, and I suspect others get that sense as well. 

I believe that God can use us to simply listen to others, and be that safe place where their thoughts can be sheltered in you. But so much of the time we are not truly listening to the other person.

I am less of a talker, so attentive listening should be (generally) easier for me to implement, but it's the thoughts in my mind that are harder to quiet. I've always had the desire to be a hospitable source for someone to feel cosy and at home. But sometimes, just as I want to be doing several things when I listen to my neighborhood, I need to be still and listen to others in a way that is in the present moment with them, and not try to do multiple things at the same time. Then something amazing happens. They are not just a friend needing to talk about something, they are part of a larger cosmic story of good, and I get to see a part of that.

May Reads

Just a few of the books I've been reading this month.

The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco
I browsed bookshops in Reykjavik, Iceland, but didn't plan to buy books because everything in Iceland is more expensive, and most of their books are in Icelandic anyway. However, every bookshop had sections of books in English, and I cannot resist taking a look at what books they carried. I kept eyeing up this book, in a few shops. On the last day in Iceland, I had extra cash to use. There was no sense in bringing back so much money, so I ended up in a bookshop where I bought two books. This was one of them. The story takes place in 1327, when a monk, Brother William, and his young apprentice visit a wealthy abbey in Italy only to find as they arrived that a murder had just taken place. Or was it murder? Brother William becomes the detective who is asked to solve the mystery, but things get even more mysterious as another death occurs. Then another. There are mysterious findings in the library, a labyrinth in the library, hidden passages, and secrets. The observations and conclusions of Brother William are so enjoyable to read, very much in the tradition of Sherlock. 

The Diary of a Bookseller by Shaun Bythell
This book is so interesting to me. It is truly a diary written by Shaun, the owner of The Bookshop, the largest used bookstore in Scotland (Wigtown, Scotland). He writes about all the happenings of the bookshop. Recording the strange things customers say, the odd requests he gets, how he buys books, notes about the book trade, online orders, the people who work for him, the nature of the bookshop (freezing cold in the winter), and tidbits of his life in the everyday of a book shop owner. He writes with a wry humour that makes me chuckle often. I am also learning more about what it is like to own a bookshop. Being that I've always had this far-reaching dream of owning a bookshop someday, this book is particularly fascinating to me. I feel it's a good idea to learn about many of the realities, work, and fun it is to own a bookshop. 

Shilling for My Thoughts by G.K. Chesterton
I cannot get enough of G.K. Chesterton. I found this little collection of essays on my recent visit to Oxford. It is my favourite kind of book - old (this one is 1921), small, hardback. I am not sure how he has this gift, but he can write an essay about something so minuscule, such as a piece of chalk and make it so entertaining and fun. He collides humour and wit with knowledge about the world, history, and meanings in things. He finds wisdom in the objects in his pocket. He notices all the quirks of traveling and spells it out in a quip about his recent train ride. I am so thankful Chesterton wrote an enormous amount of books and essays,because I always seem to find a few more books in Oxford each time I go, and they always bring me such joy to read them (and re-read them).

Icelandic Beauty

Once upon a time I was standing on some sand. Not any usual sand, but black volcanic sand. I looked down and saw how strange it looked to have pure black sand at my feet. I had just been shuffling through it to get to this place. I looked up and saw the tip of the glacier, glowing bluish against the overcast grey-scale sky. 

I looked around me, knowing that I was next to a volcano that was active and prepped to burst at any time. Was the ground shaking? No, that was just me slipping down some sand as made my way down a hill of black sand closer to the melted water's edge. As the glacier retreats, it leaves behind some of its broken chunks of ice, floating in the water. Is this place real? Am I at the dawn of creation? The world is still being made, here. This is still earth largely untouched by humans. We leave behind our footprints in the sand, and hopefully that is it.

I take a deep breathe of fresh air. The air is chilled, but not frigid. Here in between the green carpeted cliffs and mountains, the air is still. If there is a slight breeze, it is very cold because it comes off the glacier. 

How can a world of ash, rock, and snow be so beautiful? Many would call this landscape barren, but the dramatic cliffs with pops of mossy green and the icy expanse of a huge glacier is what causes me to stand in awe of God's creative power in the form of nature. I call this beautiful, yes, my favourite kind of beautiful is that which draws me closer to God. 

This kind of place, most of which Iceland is a perfect example, makes me think about the ever-changing, shaping, and molding of nature, and how our lives follow in the same way. We are not done yet. We are works-in-progress. So is this Icelandic landscape. It's all still changing. God's eyes are on it all. None of it escapes His sight and presence. 

Here I am

Here I am
In a quiet refuge of reflection
As the soft pitter patter of raindrops
Lulls the evening to sleep
As I should be
And yet
Here I am
Staying up late with candles burning
And words brewing within
They need a place to go
So here they are with me
Falling a gentle rain
Like grace.

A bright red cardinal is living in my neighbourhood. I've seen him several times over these last few days. He's been hanging out on the bird feeder, dangling from the orchid tree in my yard. He grabs a snack, and flutters off to the tree across the alley, chirping his very distinctive song and I watch him in wonder. Then I hear the owl hooting nearby, too. I love that my little yard is a welcoming place for such lovely creatures. And as my landlord works on the yard more and more, clearing things out and adding more elements of a garden, the space will become even more of a refuge and dwelling spot, for humans and creatures alike. The cat has already been testing out the new bench and table, and I told him that he cannot hog the bench for himself. I may want to bring my book out there one morning.

The last few nights have provided the perfect atmosphere of rainy and cosy. Amidst all the day's activity and things to do, I have been trying to simply sit and listen. What does the rain sound like? Is it the sound of the metal railing that I hear, or the roof over the front of my home? Sometimes I find that when I stop to pay attention to the present moment and observe the senses, a few things happen all at the same time. I feel thankfulness for that moment and the blessing that it is to me and I hear words rummaging around in my head that can find a place to rest on pages of my journal. 

Eternity is Now

My eternal self is here.
Now is the day
Every day is the time
to live into it, new creation.
Every moment matters
Every effort matters
It sets the tone for the next
When all we do and all we are
will be perfected
All our efforts will be seen in 
the beauty they were meant 
to be.
A gift. We shall see
It's all going on now.
Every moment matters.

Say hello to moments that matter. When we learn to change our view of how we look upon each day, and we see each moment as a beautiful gift it all looks different (fresh, as if seen with new eyes) and we live with an appreciation about it all. When I recognize that what I do now matters in the eternal perspective, it causes me to think more deeply about every step and every thought I let sink in. What do I let myself dwell upon? 

And on the other side, what am I creating and doing that will be continued into eternity? Am I using my gifts in all the ways I can for God's glory? Am I removing myself from the equation so that my own clutter doesn't hinder me?

These questions cause me to pause and reflect, because I am a work in progress, I know there is more to do. That fact is encouraging to me, as it means I am not done yet and there is so much more I can be and do. These questions remind me to be more and more who God created me to be.

Walk to Emmaus

Stand here awhile and drink their silence in.
Annealed in glass, the twelve Apostles stand
And each of them is keeping faith for you.
This roof is held aloft, to give you space,
By graceful angels praying night and day
That you might hear some rumour of their flight
That you might feel the flicker of a wing
And let your heart fly free at last in prayer.
(Malcolm Guite)

When you experience an event that demonstrates the love of God in every aspect, it takes a long time to fully grasp it and reflect upon it. It's so much to collect, it's like trying to fit a lake into a glass jar. I know that I will need to take one scoop at a time.

I recently took the Walk to Emmaus and have been in constant reflection since the end of last weekend. It was held at a retreat center, away from the busy-ness of a city, and all those distractions that come with it. I am so thankful for the many people who were involved in that weekend, behind the scenes, before, during, and after. Friends. Family. My new Emmaus community.

I sat there on my bunk bed that first night feeling displaced. We all were. I wrote in my journal with the mindset of having no idea what the next few days would entail. We all were on the strange and unknown journey. I decided to give all the details of what I was encountering some good thought, and embrace the unknown, and it became a beautiful time of opening up to God. The communal living kept me in mind of those who lived together such as the Disciples and monks, where an essential element of their lives was community. Sharing meals, sharing learning, sharing the hours.

I sat at a table with five other ladies (and we shared meals together, chapel, and lessons). These ladies shared their hearts and souls, which was so amazing to me. They reached for tissues often as this place gave them the opportunity to work through some things. I did the same. The Lord reached deeply into me, and sorted through some things I needed to give Him. We learned about different kinds of graces the Lord bestows on all of us.

One of the big impacts on me was how much I was surrounded by prayer. I had no idea as I arrived, but slowly I would learn bit by bit how my friends and other lovely people there who didn't know me were praying for me by name. They would pray over certain events and special times during the weekend. This kind of selfless, dedicated prayerfulness I had not experienced before and I felt overwhelmed with the presence of God's love.

This kind of experience transcends the weekend. It will stay with me for years, and I will continue to learn from it. I expect bursts of it to emerge every now and then as I pray that I reflect and grow wiser from the knowledge I received.

Tolkien on Light and Darkness

Through the telling of complex histories and stories, J.R.R. Tolkien built a world bigger far more expansive than Middle-earth. Before Frodo or Aragorn entered the story, he had created a cosmos supposal, with a creator and beings who continued to create the cosmos through music. It is a history of a sub-created world, The Silmarillion is, which precedes all tales of Middle-earth, and through these tales the consequence of decisions is passed down through generations. Elves, like men, have free will, the misunderstanding and misuse of that ability causes the fall of many good things. 

Tolkien was a master at creating tales of the fall and studying the consequences of our actions. In his view "there cannot be any 'story' without a fall - all stories are ultimately about the fall - at least not for human minds as we know them and have them."

We should know very well in our modern day how the temptation of power within a leader or influencer can change the lives of many with a small decision to follow darkness that leads to destruction of light down the line. When the significant choice is made out of selfish desire, it sets the tone for not only that person, but for all the lives that intersect for ages. 

The intensity of his nature drives him both to make and to break, and here again we see in him humanity's potential poised always on the edge, balanced between light and darkness.
 (Verlyn Flieger)

There are so many avenues in which Tolkien uses the light and darkness to capture what he was so passionate about reiterating in story. He uses the tales of elves and men and their downfall so that we can see in ourselves the same selfish desires and actions we take, and heed that warning. Through his sub-created world, he imagines the conflicts that arise as different races (elves and men) intermingle with each other, with nature, and with the temptations of the darkness.

The darkness is not always bad. In the beginning the darkness of space and time was neutral. On a starlit evening, the darkness is not evil. It is part of creation. But the bad darkness that takes over what was light, corrupts and ruins what was good. This is an aspect of loss deeper and more painful because it is the absence of light which had once been life-giving. 

For Tolkien that is shown by characters not willing to yield to a good choice. They instead choose selfishly to hang onto what they possess and need to let go of. Feanor has the chance to give up the the Silmarils (jewels he created that hold the light) to make good again the world and rid it of darkness, but he will not do it. In his free will, he chooses to hoard his possession. That one decision sparks the downfall and destruction of so much good. Frodo is an example of this as he stands on the brink of fire on Mount Doom at last, after such a long journey, and has the chance to throw the ring over to destroy it and save the world from Sauron, but he cannot give it up, and he fails, sealing in the darkness by his choice. Thankfully that story does not end there, and a surprising twist of fate brings Gollum into a vitally important role in the destruction of the ring.

Tolkien was pointing out that while external events may be dire and dark, the most important aspect of what happens and a determining factor as to whether light can win the battle at last is our internal free will and the individual test of that. He explores this again and again, and from story to story we are reminded through beauty loyalty, love, and courage that there is always reason to hope that the light will endure.