Long Weekend Reading

It seems like a long weekend is due. I know that I need a day off, how about you? So, a weekend with family sounds good. And reading. Lots of reading.

Last weekend in Gainesville I discovered a used bookstore that is literally two minutes from my brother's house (how have I never been there before??). Therefore, a stop a this bookstore was a must. I had a book in my hands before I even entered the store. They had shelves outside on the sidewalk, and I found a 1971 version of C.S. Lewis' The Last Battle. I love this old version with the colorful front and cheesy descriptions on the back cover. Finding the old versions of beloved favourites is such a treat. When I left the bookstore, I had a whole armful of books. That's my favourite kind of book shopping. All used. All books I have been looking for.

Here's a few books that will be in my hands this weekend:

The Bible- this is of course the most important. I read through 1 Kings and now I am reading 2 Kings. I don't think I have ever been so engrossed in reading the Old Testament as I have been lately. These stories are crazy! Check it out for yourself....

Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury- I just finished reading this. I couldn't put it down. Again, another classic that I have never read. This book is so good on so many levels. The writing, the story, the morals, the way he wrote this in the 1950s predicting a future world that takes place today, and how scarily accurate he predicted our world to be. It deals with government censorship and book burning. Books are banned because they create "confusion" when people read them and think for themselves.

We Have Always Lived in the Castle, Shirley Jackson- I just started reading this and it's so quirky and dark. I like that. The characters are interesting and keeping me engrossed in this murder mystery. The whimsical tones and descriptions are so appealing to me. Here's an example, "I remember that I stood on the library steps holding my books and looking for a minute at the soft hinted green in the branches against the sky and wishing, as I always do, that I could walk home across the sky instead of through the village (pg 4)."

The Works of John Donne- John Donne (1572-1631) is what they call a metaphysical poet. His poems are pretty difficult reading. I have read several before and really like his Divine Poems and look forward to challenging myself with reading his others.

The Yearling, Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings- This is another classic that I have never read, even though it takes place in Florida where Rawlings lived. I was browsing online and saw a short discussion on this book, and I am eager to read it.

October Country, Ray Bradbury- This is a collection of short stories. Eerie stories. It is almost that Autumn Halloween time of year, so I am getting in the spirit. I am becoming a fan of Ray Bradbury. I am normally drawn to the British writers, but he is an excellent American writer, so I will be seeking out his books even more.

Rilke, New Poems 1908, The Other Part- I found this at the used bookstore and it has even more Rilke poems that I have not seen yet. As I have been saying a lot lately, I can't seem to get enough of Rilke.

What are you reading now?

Journal Musings - Pride

Somehow, in some infinite heavenly way, God is interested in me. He is focused on me, even at times when I go about feeling like I might be invisible (and not just because I am as pale as a ghost).
It seems like it would be the easiest thing, then, to fully embrace God and really let Him in to be the center, right?
It's hard because we cannot see or touch God, so it is based on faith that we have to trust.
We hope for things we cannot see, so our faith can flourish in the uncertainty. Our faith can grow even when our lives are surrounded by question marks.

In fact, lately, I have felt like a floating island in a sea of question marks, and if I let myself, I could spend all day worrying and asking "what if" and fretting over what may or may not happen. But I mostly choose (and yes it is a choice) to focus on the good: the gifts that God has given me this moment. When I focus on saying thank you to God for each little joy in my day, I am recognizing that these good things are only possible because of God. He is the source of it all. It's not coming from me in any way.

It's when we start to think that something good happened because we are smart, wise, strong, experienced, or clever, we begin to reek of pride. According to C.S. Lewis, pride is the worst of all sins because all vices stem from pride. We make ourselves a god with pride.
Pride is what made Satan. Pride is what caused man to fall. Satan approached us saying, 'hey, do you want to know everything? Do you want to be a god? Here, do this and you won't need God because you will be as great as God.'
That's how Satan lures us in. Pride.

I Want A Lot

You see, I want a lot.
Maybe I want it all:
the darkness of each endless fall,
the shimmering light of each ascent.

So many are alive who don't seem to care.
Casual, easy, they move in the world
as though untouched.

But you take pleasure in the faces
of those who know they thirst.
You cherish those
who grip you for survival.

You are not dead yet, it's not too late
to open your depths by plunging into them
and drink in the life
that reveals itself quietly there.

-Rainer Rilke

I remind myself that while I do not deserve anything, God, You have given me so much. I am blessed with riches that are not asked for. I am thankful.
In these moments of struggle, You are there. You know it's a struggle for me and yet You love me nonetheless. You reach out and take my hand as I seek You.

You enfold me in Your safe arms and remind me that You love me more than I can possibly understand. You know each long strand of red hair on my head and You know when I obey even when it is hardest for me.

I want my talents to be used by You, God, for Your glory. I don't want to wallow when something doesn't go my way, but be zealous for You. Give me a joyful obedience and patience for Your perfect plans to unfold at the proper time.

May I use each day to bring Your goodness to light. Don't let me waste a day, for time is fleeting.

Shelter

Rain splashing around my feet
my stride quickens
as I hurry to a covered spot,
sheltering myself
against the strengthening storm.

A gray blanket above me
releases heavy drops.
Falling fast through thick air,
the scent of rain
seems sweet against
a bitter day.

The umbrella is useless now;
Just let the soaking rain in;
sheltering myself in the Divine
loving arms
is all I need anyway

Scottish Day

Since my brother Jason and I got back from our second trip to the UK in 2010, we have been trying to get together with Nora for a Scottish Day. It's a new holiday we made up that celebrates the UK by sharing stories and photos from our trip and eating classic UK cuisine. Nora has a lot of family history and heritage from Scotland and Northern England, so she was very interested in learning about what we did so she could plan her own trip there one day!

 This weekend, almost two years after our trip, we finally made the get together happen! I was impressed that Jason had a few food items saved from our trip that we could all enjoy. I didn't even know he still had them!

Scottish Day Menu:

Homemade Shepherd's Pie
Baguettes with tomato chutney (Jason bought the chutney when we were in Scotland)
Irn Bru (a Scottish soda)
Fermented Cider (Jason bought when we were on the Isle of Skye)
Cadbury digestive biscuits (with chocolate on one side)
Assortment of Twinings Tea

The photos on this wall were all taken on our trip (all of them are Scotland), and Jason picked a few of his favourites for his wall.

Shipwrecked

C.S. Lewis Week: Part V

You also have a fatal flaw in your character. All the hopes and plans of others have again and again shipwrecked on your character just as your hopes and plans have shipwrecked on theirs.
It is no good passing this over some vague, general admission such as "Of course, I know I have my faults." It is important to realize that there is some really fatal flaw in you: something which gives the others just that same feeling of despair which their flaws give you. And it is almost certainly something you don't know about....But why, you ask, don't others tell me? Believe me, they have tried to tell you over and over again, and you just couldn't "take it."
-"The Trouble with 'X'", C.S. Lewis

One thing I love about C.S. Lewis is how he is so honest in his writing. It feels like you are sitting down with him at a local pub (and by "local", I mean Oxford, of course), with a cup of tea or a pint of beer, and he is just talking with you like a good friend, telling you things you need to hear but might be difficult to hear because they challenge you. There are so many writers that beat-around-the-bush that sometimes when I am reading I want to say "just say it!" C.S. Lewis just says it. He might go into an explanation to set up the background, first, but that only makes you grasp the truth even better.

Before we can be cured we must want to be cured.
-Mere Christianity

We tend to make excuses for ourselves a lot. To cover our flaws. We are too busy to change, not ready, afraid, or we rationalize that it's not harming anyone else. But instead of seeking God's help to do something about our own flaw, we think about other people's flaws too much. In his essay, C.S. Lewis encourages us to look to our own flaws for correction and to stop thinking about other people's faults. For it is with ourselves that we can do something, which is the next step in wisdom.

A handful of the books I have are collections of C.S. Lewis' essays. This excerpt is from such a collection. I read through this book again last week, during my breaks at work. I took it with me to Black 'n Brew for an iced coffee lunch break to read. Losing myself in his words, I longed for everyone to read these essays. To know truth and to feel convicted by it.
Even when some of these things are reminders, sometimes we need to be reminded more than we need to be introduced to something.

Lies are swirling!

C.S. Lewis Week: Part IV

In the first place our warped natures, the devils who tempt us, and all the contemporary propaganda for lust, combine to make us feel that the desires we are resisting are so 'natural', so 'healthy', and so reasonable, that it is almost perverse and abnormal to resist them.
-Mere Christianity, C. S. Lewis

This is dangerous territory because it's so ingrained in our culture today. In fact, it's so ingrained in culture that I guarantee most people would think these views of C.S. Lewis are old and ridiculous! That is also why it is such a critical topic for today. Lewis wrote these words around 1943, so think about how much has changed in this world since then. Think about how much more propaganda is out there targeting us to give in to temptation of whatever kind. We deserve it. It's normal. Everyone is doing it.

One reason I am loving life without TV is that it is one facility where I am not being inundated with such nonsense that is prevalent in shows and in commercials. The messages that are slowly being slipped into even the most 'family-friendly' shows is steering our culture to even more loss of virtue. I am discovering that I am more thoughtful when I do watch something.

Another dangerous thing is that, like all lies, it is based on a truth. Many of these things we are tempted by are not in-and-of-themselves bad at all. That is true. However, misused and misguided they can easily be.

But we are all seeking to be happy in life, right? We are told to do whatever it takes to be happy. Who is making this stuff up? (hint- he might have hoofs and horns)

For any happiness, even in this world, quite a lot of restraint is going to be necessary; so the claim made by every desire, when it is strong, to be healthy and reasonable, counts for nothing. Every sane and civilised man must have some set of principles by which he chooses to reject some of his desires and to permit others. (pg 100)

Fitting In

C.S. Lewis Week: Part III

I may repeat 'Do as you would be done by' till I am black in the face, but I cannot really carry it out till I love my neighbor as myself: and I cannot learn to love my neighbor as myself till I learn to love God: and I cannot learn to love God except by learning to obey Him. And so, as I warned you, we are driven on to something more inward- driven on from social matters to religious matters. For the longest way round is the shortest way home.
-Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis

The rain has been falling gently now for a little while. As my mind floats around the dream I woke up from this morning, I reach for my Bible to continue reading through 1 Kings.

It is kind of crazy, by the way, how much God makes His presence known throughout the Old Testament.  The people don't really want to hear God because they still turn their backs and choose to follow other gods and their own sinful desires. Then brief moments of amazement occur, like when Elijah sets up a sacrifice and asks God to make it known to the crowd that He is God. God responds by engulfing the sacrifice in flames and all the people are amazed, suddenly believing. Well, of course it would be easier to believe when God is displayed right there in front of you. Right? The crowd mind-set of disbelief turned to belief means everyone is fitting in with each other.

Then after Jesus' resurrection, the Holy Spirit was given to us, and God does not intervene like He used to. Everything changes, as we change. Is it all in God's plans? Of course, He knows how we have changed, even though many of the same struggles and sins haunt us as they did thousands of years ago.

Today, we are to have faith in what we cannot see. Our world has a mindset of 'seeing is believing' so perhaps that is what many people struggle with, but it should also be the first clue that what we are meant for is something so much more than what we 'see' here. However, it goes against the way of the world. But isn't that what God calls us to anyway? Jesus went against the way of the world. He ate with sinners, he said blessed are the meek, he owned nothing, he loved everyone including the poor and sick, he would seek time of solitude by himself for prayer.

We may note in passing that He [Jesus] was never regarded as a mere moral teacher. He did not produce that effect on any of the people who actually met Him. He produced mainly three effects- Hatred- Terror- Adoration. There was no trace of people expressing mild approval.
-God in the Dock, C.S. Lewis

Never are we told to seek the way of the world.
Never are we encouraged to try to fit in.
In contrast, we are told not to be surprised when we are hated, or when we are faced with trials. Jesus was either hated, feared, or adored, as C.S. Lewis so aptly points out. So if we are to strive to become like Jesus, why should we be shocked to come across anything similar?

Nothing in this world can satisfy

C.S. Lewis Week: Part II

If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. If none of my earthly pleasures satisfy it, that does not prove that the universe is a fraud. Probably earthly pleasures were never meant to satisfy it...
-Mere Christianity

C.S. Lewis brings to light matters that you may have wondered and thought about, or maybe not, but when he brings up a topic, you realize how applicable it is to you, and how his reasoning makes so much sense. You read it, and you say to yourself "yes, exactly. That is so true. Why did I not think of it like that before?"

I find myself quoting (or paraphrasing) his writing all the time in various situations because his words are suitable for many occasions, and he has written on a myriad of topics (just in Mere Christianity here are a few- hope, faith, marriage, morals, sex, forgiveness, pride, time, freewill, love, charity)  that there is always something wise to take from him. Best of all, he writes in such a manner that while he is discussing something deep, he is able to make comparisons in an "ordinary" way, using daily objects or situations (humanity like a band playing a tune,  human individuals gone wrong as ships colliding, or unattainable perfection like changing gears as we drive)

If you have never read anything by C.S. Lewis, I don't think I could recommend an author more than him. I own every book I can get my hands on, and re-read them all the time. They are full of my pen marks and underlines (which is how you can tell that I love a book. The more ink marks, the more I love it). I am reading Mere Christianity again because it's been many years since I have read it. If you want to borrow a book, just let me know! If you want to read a little more about Lewis and when he became a Christian, click here for one of my past posts about the inspiring story.

A couple years ago I discovered a Brooke Fraser song called "C.S. Lewis Song". I was immediately drawn to the message because the words are taken from Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis' most widely read book. The video above is the music video.

Mere Christianity and Me

C.S. Lewis Week: Part I

Enemy-occupied territory- that is what this world is. Christianity is the story of how the rightful king has landed, you might say landed in disguise, and is calling us all to take part in a great campaign of sabotage. When you go to church you are really listening-in to the secret wireless from our friends: that is why the enemy is so anxious to prevent us from going. He does it by playing on our conceit and laziness and intellectual snobbery.

-Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis

I spent a lot of time with C.S. Lewis this weekend. I didn't really plan on it, though I had been keen on reading Mere Christianity again, since it was many years ago that I read it. But my body wasn't liking me on Saturday, so I spent a lot of time on my sofa, reading or crocheting. I ended up reading more than half of Mere Christianity on Saturday. It is not the kind of book you skim and read quickly (like a quick fiction story), but it's one that you read slowly and absorb the truth he is writing about. In this case, his most popular and well-known book, he states the case for Christianity and then goes through the beliefs and the behavior of Christians.

He asks the questions we have all asked or we have heard others ask when they are having trouble believing, such as "why is God letting evil occupy the world? Why doesn't he just come invade and set things right?" Well, the answer is so obvious that we fail to see it. God will invade, but when He does, it's the end of the world.

When the author walks on to the stage the play is over. God is going to invade, all right: but what is the good of saying you are on His side, then, when you see the whole natural universe melting away like a dream... (pg 65)

It is sometimes a difficult topic to think about. The end. That's why the Book of Revelation is not at the top of everyone's list of what they like to read in the Bible. But it is going to happen. Lewis brings up a really good additional point that works in our favor. That God is giving us time to join his side by choosing on our own. That's how Lewis brings it back to the present, with what to do about it now. All we can do is choose what to do with the time that is given to us because none of us knows what the next day will bring.

Now, today, this moment, is our chance to choose the right side. God is holding back to give us that chance. It will not last forever. We must take it or leave it. (pg 65)