26 August 2014

The Wind in the Trees

Sometimes I sit in my quiet home and just listen. My gaze wanders past the curtains and outside where heat and sun swirl. I let the loud silence wash over me. It is usually when I am trying to collect my thoughts into something coherent that I do this. Or when being alone feels lonely.

Because sometimes being alone doesn't feel lonely, but sometimes it really does.

It is when the air feels constricting and full of emptiness. The birds seem to have relocated for no songs can be heard. Thoughts in my own mind wander but don't dive into anything deep. The kind of meandering that falls off the trail and loses the path.

Not having information and losing the path in my thoughts makes me wonder what I am doing wrong. I need information.

Truths dwell in my heart and my focus is affixed suddenly. A gusty wind moves the branches of trees and I watch them toss about. What is the power that moves such large branches? Not one of us can control the wind. It is invisible and yet we see it through other things, like the rustling of trees. A long skirt tugging around your legs. The invisible air grazing past your neck.

In my life there are times where I feel like I am not moving forward. I sometimes doubt myself and my abilities. A standstill is something I fear, but I feel deep inside that a wind is moving me. God is in the wind.

It can be a gentle nudge, or a gusty-wind-tossed push, but since God wants what is best for me, in all situations I have to trust. Let go. And trust.

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